


Crush

by Xou



Category: Baccano!
Genre: Aromantic, Assumptions, Awkwardness, F/M, I had to create the tag for my ship how sad is this, Mutually Unrequited, Not My Fault, Series Spoilers, What Have I Done, Yes it Is, assumed crushes, do not read this if you have not read the novels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-09
Updated: 2016-10-09
Packaged: 2018-08-20 07:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8240920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xou/pseuds/Xou
Summary: Elmer assumes Sylvie has a crush on him. Sylvie thinks Elmer have a crush on her. Neither really likes each other, but neither dare to say so, to avoid hurting the other (inexistent) feelings. It is, overall, a complete mess.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Warning!! This fallow the events of the novels, so Sylvie and Elmer meet again in 2001 and not before. Also, Elmer still hasn't seen Huey since forever (which makes me sad). This story happen between 2001 and 2002, so keep that in mind. Also, if you haven't read the novels, lots of spoilers are in this, so it's maybe not the best idea to read this? Sorry?
> 
> I would like to mention again that I had to create the tag for my ship... AND I DON'T EVEN WRITE THEM BEING TOGETHER, GDI ME.  
> There's some hints of Huey/Elmer in this, but not in a shippy way. Aromantic!Elmer, on the other hand, is more than hinted.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this and pardon my poor english c:

 

 

They met again in 2001. After nearly 300 years of not seeing each other, Elmer can only say he was surprised to see how much Sylvie had changed after all this time.

 

She was light a ray of moonlight dancing in front of his eyes, silver hair, now shorter, framing her lovely face, a delicate face so different from the childish round trait that Elmer remembered. But it was still the Sylvie he knew from forever ago, so long ago that it was a blur. But could he say that he knew this Sylvie now? Elmer always thought that he could read other people pretty well. It was something he had to do after all, how could he make people smile if he didn't know how to read other person? Contrary to what most people thought about him, Elmer was a pretty smart man.

And yet, he found himself almost completely speechless in front of this Sylvie. It was still Sylvie, just... An older Sylvie. A much prettier Sylvie. A much more intimating Sylvie. She was like a fantastic creature that had appeared in his vision, ideal and impossible, overwhelming and exciting, perfect and improbable, implausible and impeccable. Words were missing him, so he just made a joke, as always and laughed. This was normal. Everything was ok. He could still do this, after all, the good old Sylvie still had to be somewhere underneath all this perfect and perfection. The one that had given him the cold shoulder more time than most and elbowed him deeply on the side once upon a time. The one that had let him drag her around town, so she could sneak out to see her secret boyfriend.

Elmer still remembered the smile on her lips back there. It was a lovely smile on a less than gorgeous face, but the untainted smile on her lips had been the most beautiful sight. Now, all the smiles Sylvie had were hooded with regrets and something deeper. Deeper, darker, darker and yet darker things. Elmer didn't like those smiles. It was not for nothing that he had compared the young woman to his oldest friend, Huey, the first time they had seen each other again. Something about their smile was too similar to make Elmer comfortable (and it took a lot to make Elmer uncomfortable. And by that, I mean: a lot). Sylvie smile reminded him of the smile that appeared on Huey lips ever since he had lost Monica. It made him feel uneasy, but he would still attempt to make his friend smile honestly once again. The, he better show him the greatest smile in the world, it was a promise. And Elmer promised himself, he would do the same thing for Sylvie. Even if he had to bring the dead back to life for that.

 

And well, he thought for a long moment that this was what he had to do for her. But now, things seemed to have shifted and Elmer was not sure if something had changed or if he was just actually seeing things.

 

But, the thing was, he could not imagining those sort of things...

 

 

Sylvie and Gretto had been this thing. This solid tangible thing and Sylvie back then, still a young innocent girl, however, had the utmost fate that they could have an happy ending. And for everything that was worth something, Elmer believed in her. He had wanted to believe in her so hard. He didn't know Gretto really well, but he could tell, he was the luckiest man. Or had been the luckiest man when he was alive.

Elmer didn't like to think about it. He hoped that Gretto had a smile on his lips when he passed away, but he doubted it. Sometimes, Elmer wondered if Sylvie should have fallowed him into the after life. So maybe then, they could be happy in their own little Romeo and Juliet story. They find each other again in the after life and can be happy together forever.

 

But there was a reason Sylvie was not dead, just like there was a reason Huey was still alive, despite having lost Monica. There had to be a reason, or else fate was mocking them (Or, really, in Huey case, it was another thing starting with the letter F... No, it's not fuck, though you might want to say that. Fuck you Fermet). Both Huey and Sylvie along had to stay alive, just so they could get another chance at happiness. Even then, Elmer wasn't sure if Huey was managing to do just that. It was so long too since they had last seen each other, but he hoped so... Back to Sylvie now. She had to find another chance at happiness too, that was why she was alive. Happiness was so much better than a petty revenge, happiness he desperately wanted her to get. Or well, Elmer should have thought a little more before saying those words so hastily, because he never imagined that her happiness could come from him.

 

Don't misread him!! Elmer always wanted to make other people happy! It was his goal, to see the world smiling. But he was not used to a smile being on someone lips because of him, as a person, and not at something he did.

And yet, now that they met each other again, Sylvie just had the tiniest, shy smile on her beautiful lips each time she saw him. It was somehow out of place on her perfect face and Elmer was not sure what emotion to read in that smile. He had no idea what it meant, but he smiled back anyway.

 

After all, if Sylvie was smiling, he should be happy too, right?...

 

... God, what the hell was this. He was supposed to give people happiness, but not like this!! This was way too much. Elmer preferred to detach himself from the situation, seeing people happy outside of his person was more than enough for him. But having someone happiness depending entirely on him... Elmer didn't like it. It was not his job he felt, this was something different. Never would he had thought that he was one of those person that could depend on someone else. He didn't want to be that kind of person. If he saw other people happy, it was more than enough. He didn't have to play on the scene, it was weird having his own happiness depends so much on others and yet... Not.

 

Elmer could not imagine himself liking someone else, not like this anyway. Everyone was the same to him, no one happiness mattered more than another. I guess that was why you couldn't call him a reliable guy, but Elmer didn't care. If other people were happy, than he was happy too, it was simple like that.

 

And yet, he couldn't help but feel slightly uncomfortable when he caught Sylvie eyes on him or the shy smile on her lips. It was making him flustered, but not in the good way. It was just uncomfortable and not wanted.

But again, Elmer would do anything just to make someone else smile. So he bore with it and decided to hide his discomfort.

 

 

He was not sure he could be anything like Gretto. After all, Elmer was him and not Gretto. And he was pretty sure Sylvie was not ready for another Gretto in her life, but it was not his choice to decide for her.

But if Sylvie wanted him to be that person for him, then he would try his best.

 

 

The smile on her lips would have to be worth all his pain, wouldn't it?

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

If Sylvie was like moonlight, than Elmer was like the sun. Nobody likes to look at him directly, standing under or near him for a long exposure of time makes other feel all hot and uncomfortable and he needed to stay at least approximately 92,960,000 miles away from her.

 

Well, he had some redeeming qualities (?), Sylvie guessed. As she had seen with Phil and even before that, he cared deeply for other people and he was good with children. Even so, Sylvie was pretty sure you still shouldn't trust Elmer around a child. Who know what he would do, half the time when he was interacted with someone younger than him, Elmer just had to jump off from wherever he was standing to kill himself for no valid reason, be that the roof of a manor or the Manhattan bridge. That's not exactly good parenting or babysitting features right here.

 

But still, Sylvie couldn't say that she had not miss, in someways somehow, Elmer. It was weirdly comforting to notice that despite the fact that thing had changed so much in all the years she was alive, certain things, like Elmer, would never change its way. It was comforting in the strangest way to notice that the man was exactly as she remembered him to be. It was like she was a teenager again, going back to Lotto Valentino, where things were not exactly good, but familiar enough that she felt at home. And back then, Gretto was alive too.

 

But it was no use thinking about those things.

 

Elmer may not have changed, but everything else around her had and it was no use thinking about those old days. They were far behind her and she was a new person now. It didn't matter where she come from or who she used to be, after all she had completely changed her appearance to forget about this past and move on from it. And get revenge on the man that killed her boyfriend too, I guess. But apparently, that boat had sail long ago. That made her feel somehow petty, but she still regretted not have got her revenge. She cursed that boat and what had happened on it. Nothing against boat in general here. But boat sucked. Nothing ever good happened on boats. Or on trains for that matter. Fuck trains. Public transport is the worst.

 

 

Anyway, let's get back to Elmer and what Sylvie thought of the man. It was not like Sylvie was unused to the stare of people lingering on her just a little too long. But Elmer eyes on her... Felt different. She was not sure how to describe it.

 

Like she said, she was used to the male stare. The one that objectify her and saw her as nothing more than a pretty face. But they would never get closer to her, so it was not like she cared. And Sylvie was used to jealousy stare. The woman that just wished to be in her skin and at her place, not realizing just how much she had suffered to get to where she was. Sometimes, stare cursed her. Sometimes, stare desired her. But nothing was quite like Elmer stare. It was just detached from her, looking past all the artifice to stare as her as a person. It was like he was looking directly into her soul. It made her feel both uneasy and somewhat grateful that someone could still look at her and see past all of her beauty. It was a wonder how Elmer managed to do it. Especially since he seemed to have his eyes closed most of the time. Didn't he need to open his eyes to see?... Yet, another mystery about the man called Elmer. Also known as ''the smile man''. He's real and he sucked my dick.

 

 

Sylvie was not sure how it all started. When she first noticed that he was usually by her side, standing with her every step of the way.

 

It was not unwelcome.... Not per say. It was sort of weird, but still, Sylvie made effort and each time, offered Elmer a small awkward smile. The man seemed overjoyed each time (but really, when didn't he...?). She was not sure how to let him down gently. If someone deserved love, it was Elmer. He give so much to others, without ever expecting to receive anything back. Surely, he deserved to have a little taste of happiness and love too. He gave and gave and gave so much of him, it only seemed fair.

 

Sylvie just wasn't sure if she was the one that could give him those things.

 

She only loved once and she knew how that one love ended. Even now, she was not ready to open herself like this again, especially since she hadn't really gotten closure over Gretto, even after all this time.

 

Sylvie would still let Elmer stay by her side. But she didn't wish for anything more. But if she let him be just close enough, would he be satisfied?

 

 

It was better than nothing. She hoped she could make him happy too.

 

 

It was only fair if he was in love, right...?

 

 

* * *

 

  

''Hey, have you seen Phil?''

 

 

Sylvie slowly got her head up from the embroidery she was doing. She didn't remember when she had picked up the hobby, it was probably a remains of her education as a proper young lady and servant, but it was oddly calming to stab repetitively a piece of fabric with a sharp object and create a design afterward. The same small awkward smile found its way to her lips as she noticed Elmer in the door frame.

 

''I think she went outside. Did you want something?''

 

Elmer simply shrugged and came inside the room to sit next to her. Sylvie never quite understood if Elmer had any personal space preoccupation (and if he did, BITCH, WHERE WERE THEY??), but the fact he was so close to her made her look unblinkingly at the embroidery she was doing to avoid his gaze. For this one, she had just started, it was a simple design of a red flower blooming on the white soft background. And yet, the colors were so fundamentally different, they clashed together greatly and the flower looked like an explosion of blood she was sewing. Even if she was trying to avoid him as much as possible, Elmer words still registered to her as she continued her work:

''Nah, I actually wanted to talk to you. It's better if they're not there.''

 

 

There, Sylvie found herself somehow caught out of guard, her fingers stopping the delicate job they were doing for a long moment. She was not sure if she still had the concentration to continue after hearing those words. Nervously chewing on one of the corner of her lip, Sylvie carefully put her embroidery aside to fully concentrate her attention to Elmer:

  
'' I'm listening... What is it?''

 

She was not sure what to expect, but it certainly was not to feel a different pair of hands on hers, hugging them very delicately. His palm seemed rough against hers. It was a strange comparison, considering he was only some years older than her (or was it accurate to say so, now that she was an adult), but Elmer seemed marked by hard work and sunlight, despite their immortal flesh. Nervously, Sylvie looked at Elmer in the eyes, but his expression as always, was not saying anything about what he was thinking. But she could only guess where this was going. Just thinking about the possibility made her want to avoid Elmer gaze. Sylvie was nervous about the next words that would get out of Elmer lips. Surely, if it was a confession, she wouldn't know how to avoid it or to let down Elmer gently. But she had to. It was only right after. But again, she had not expected his next words to be this:

''It's funny how we're sort of the parents figure for Phil... I'm sure you would be a wonderful mom.''

 

The topic made her very uncomfortable, so she preferred to avoid all contact with Elmer. Sylvie slipped her hand out of his to take back her embroidery back to continue working on it again. The needles continued stabbing the same spot of red tread over and over again. She preferred to avoid Elmer eyes, but she could still feel his attention on her. Where this this aversion came from? Sylvie was not sure, but she didn't like to think about her being a mom for anyone or the possibly of creating a family... It made her uncomfortable, because she was feeling like part of it was missing. She had never felt at home before meeting Gretto. Forming a family without him felt wrong. To demise the topic, she just said hastily:

''Well, it,s not like it would happen now, would it...?''

 

She could feel Elmer move just next to her. But feeling it didn't mean she would just accept the arm coming around her shoulder or the hands attempting to stop her work on the embroidery. Accidentally, she stabbed lightly one of Elmer hand, but he didn't seem to mind when blood was slowly dropping down on his skin to stein the white fabric of the embroidery, mixing perfectly with the red flower blooming on the tissue. It only lasted a moment, the blood quickly traveling back to Elmer fingers, but it still made Sylvie feel really uncomfortable.

 

''Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to strict a nerve!! It's just... It's adorable seeing her around you, so I'm really happy you play along with this!!''

 

''... Thank you Elmer.''

 

 

With Elmer hands on her again, it was hard ignoring him again. Sure, Sylvie knew that he didn't mean anything bad by those words, but they still hurt somewhere at the back of her mind. But it was not Elmer fault, she didn't want to make him feel like it was his fault, so she offered to him the shyest of smile:

''Thank you really... Was this all you had to say? I'm afraid I don't see where you're going and I don't wanna assume anything...''

 

There, then maybe Elmer will be a little more forward about what he wanted to say and would stop turning around the topic forever. And true enough, Elmer had a nervous little laugh, before holding her hand a little tighter. Sylvie was feeling awkward and out-of-place, but she still forced the gentle smile on her lips to encourage the man to go on. Than, it would be easier to be honest with him. She was expected the confession anytime soon, with Elmer avoiding her eyes slightly, before taking a big breath in and saying those words one after the other, without pause:

''Oh, alright Sylvie.So I'm saying this because you need to know... I think you're a great person, you're excellent with Phil and I really enjoy spending time with you. I really like you, but not like this, so can you stop loving me? Please?''

 

 

''... What?''

 

 

* * *

 

 

Elmer nervously stood outside the living room. Sylvie was comfortably sited on the couch, delicately embroidering something. She seemed entirely caught up by her activity and Elmer would have preferred not disturbing her. But it was not like he had much choice, this things between them felt more and more awkward by the day, so he had to do something about it!! He would not let Sylvie pin after him for much longer, he just had to take his courage and enter this room!!

 

''Hey, have you seen Phil?''

 

  
He saw the small smile appear on Sylvie lips as she noticed his presence. Again, that smile felt weird on her face and Elmer was not sure what emotion read in it. But he took it as a good sign. Sylvie slowly got her head up from her work, before replaying softly:

''I think she went outside. Did you want something?''

 

Not sure what to answer, Elmer shrugged and got into the room, before sitting next to Sylvie. He could do it. He could do it. Sylvie was not looking at him and still sewing with so much attention, it was beautiful to see her work. It was like she was completely at ease around him, not minding his presence and continuing working. Elmer worried that they would lose this if he was honest with her. But he didn't want to give her false hope so he answered:

'Nah, I actually wanted to talk to you. It's better if they're not there.''

 

 

Sylvie seemed a little surprised and slowly put her embroidery to the side to concentrate all of her attention on him. Elmer was not sure how someone so nervous could look so adorable, Sylvie was shyly biting one corner of her lips in the most alluring way. Elmer was sure she knew the effect she had on other people, but it was not intimidating him... Much. So that was why when she invited him to go on, he immediately took her hands in his to say:

 

''It's funny how we're sort of the parents figure for Phil... I'm sure you would be a wonderful mom.''

 

 

... Wait, where was this coming from? This was not what he wanted to say at all and Sylvie looked just as confused and uncomfortable as he did. Well, it was true, Elmer truly enjoyed seeing Sylvie play around with the young girl(s), but it was not the point he wanted to bring. True, they were sort of parents figures and he wanted for the two of them to remain in this position even after confessing his true sentiment to Sylvie (''Sorry, I really don't like you this way, but can you please still play family with me?'' Suddenly sounded really pathetic, he would have to think about a better way to address this issue...), but what if by saying this, he gave even more false hope to Sylvie?...

 

Well, at least, was it a good thing that Sylvie looked just as uncomfortable. Rapidly, she escaped from his grasp to continue working on her embroidery. Avoiding her eyes, she simply said:

''Well, it,s not like it would happen now, would it...?''

 

  
Rapidly, Elmer felt even worse than before. Obviously, Sylvie regretted to never have settled down to form a family, that was obvious!! She had been so relentless in her revenge, she had forgotten all about those things and she was regretting it, that was the only explanation!! Even faster, to comfort the young woman, Elmer gave her a semi hug and rapidly stopped her hand from working on the embroidery, if she was not in the right place emotionally right now, she could easily hurt herself! He sort of felt Sylvie needle accidentally graze him and his blood drip down on her embroidery (he must have startled her and it was not like he could ruin the piece, he was immortal! TIS WAS NAUGHT THAN A SCRATCH, NOTHING BUT A FLESH WOUND), but it honestly didn't matter when he had to comfort Sylvie:

''Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to strict a nerve!! It's just... It's adorable seeing her around you, so I'm really happy you play along with this!!''

 

 

  
There he hoped that he was clear that he deeply cared about her role in his and Phil lives. And by Sylvie quiet thank you, he hoped that his intention were understood. She again had the smile on her lips, but it felt somehow different, he didn't know what had changed about it however. Still, she looked at him in the eyes when she said in a soft voice:

''Thank you really... Was this all you had to say? I'm afraid I don't see where you're going and I don't wanna assume anything...''

 

Elmer sort of felt a little out of place after this. Oh, so Sylvie knew what he was trying to do here... However, she probably expected a confession. The thought made him nervously laugh. She said she didn't want to assume anything, so he should not feel bad to deceive her expectation like this right...? Nah, Elmer still felt somehow guilty and avoiding Sylvie eyes a little because of that. She still had the shy smile on her lips and was waiting for his next words and he knew that he was going to break her heart. But it was not his fault!! He preferred to come clean once and for all:

 

''Oh, alright Sylvie.So I'm saying this because you need to know... I think you're a great person, you're excellent with Phil and I really enjoy spending time with you. I really like you, but not like this, so can you stop loving me? Please?''

 

  
''... What?''

 

The look of uttermost confusion was not what he was expecting on Sylvie face. Crying? Yes, Elmer had been prepared for crying, with the tightest of hug and the weirdest of stories to comfort the girl. But confusion? Maybe she didn't understand that he was rejecting her...? Oh, or maybe she was putting on a brave face!! Surely this was it, oh Sylvie, so strong and wonderful!!

 

 

''No, needless to say more!! It must be hard for you to hear this, but I couldn't keep the act up anymore! I know you're probably heels over head in love with me, but I could never love you like this and I didn't want for you to needlessly pin after something you can never have!!''

 

'' ... Elmer. I'm not.''

 

''... Eh?''

'' I'm not in love with you. I'm not.''

 

 

Sylvie said so in the most straight-forward way and Elmer stayed silent for a moment. he was just looking at the girl, not quite registering the words she had just said. But all this time...??? Even so, Elmer couldn't help but notice of relieved Sylvie looked after saying this. The smile on her lips was a lot more relaxed than the shy smile she had before and it was so much more beautiful. Automatically, seeing this smile, Elmer knew that she was telling the truth and he could not stop the genuine wave of laughter that escaped his lips:

 

''Oh, thank God, I was actually worried I would hurt you!! Why did I thought you had a crush on me?! Where did that come from?''

 

Sylvie laughed slightly too and her laugh was the most crystalline sound Elmer had ever heard. It was so full of joy, his heart skipped a beat for all the right reason:

''I also thought you had a crush on me, you know?...''

 

''Pff, what the hell?!''

 

 

And thew two of them continued to laugh together for a long moment, before getting back their breath and just sharing a moment together. They were so close on the small couch that they could cuddle, but for now, Elmer was just comfortable, his arms around Sylvie shoulders and his other hand still holding her hand delicately. The two of them shared a little moment, just looking at each other in the eyes and realizing just how silly they had been. This was a moment relaxing together, side by side, not romantic in the slightest way. Elmer felt really relieved and he could feel that Sylvie was too. It was perfect like this.

 

 

''You know, usually, at this point of the story the two main characters would have at least kissed, but thank god we didn't''

 

He could not say anything else before getting an elbow to the side violently. Elmer automatically started laughing at the familiarity of all this.

 

 

  
This was not a love story and it was fine this way.

 


End file.
